Shark Week

We are nearing the end and have entered was is called "shark week." Apparently this is the toughest week of the course AND we get to jump in the pool tomorrow in our clothes. I still need to figure out what I am going to wear! In other words, the end is in sight, though barely. One week from tomorrow I will be winged and I won't have to sit in that classroom anymore because I will be able to fly. Literally. But seriously. I have reached the point of deliriousness. I know it's shocking that I made it this long. As we enter our fourth straight week of lectures I can no longer keep back all of the off hand comments that come flying into my head any time a simple sentence is uttered for anything. I have a comeback for everything. Try me. The best part is our in flight boss is in this class with us and he sat by me today and threw quite a few of his own into the mix. It's like opening a soda bottle that has been shaken up and releasing some of the pressure. Since I have found an outlet for my stir crazy mind while in class I finally feel like I am in no danger of popping. Now bring on the pool.

Just a Quick Second of Space?

It's one of those days when you get home, put Father John Misty on real loud, and cook yourself an "elaborate" meal (comprised mostly of frozen things from Trador Joes, you work with what you can). It's not that things are bad or hard, it's just that things are every single day and sometimes you need a break. I had a fast sip of really good coffee with my sweet friend Becca yesterday morning in downtown Seattle and it felt like I came home. Just a little reminder that there is a world outside the four walls of our classroom (which happen to be void of any windows)that I am still connected to. And of course today it just makes me miss all my sweet friends in Portland, my lovely babies and of course my roommates! I am extremely glad to be here, mind you. I feel complete contentment in my life and in the choice to start this career. On Saturday as I flew home from Anchorage I caught a quick glance out the window and saw the bright big dipper imprinted in the sky directly above the wing (aircraft left, for those of you who know), and I felt euphoric! This is my life and I love it. But it doesn't mean that I don't miss all those people I am currently separated from and it doesn't mean that sometimes I don't just sometimes need a break. Because honey, when you sit on your butt for 9 hours a day and have to go outside and run stairs on your ten minute breaks in order to stay sane, you need a break.

I think I'm Gonna Like It Here

We had our first exam today, and not to brag or anything but I got 100%. It's supposed to be the easiest one. After we all debriefed in the hall and went back into the classroom we continued to be lectured at for another 8 hours while we, who were hired to move around and chat and entertain, sit on our butts for far too long. But today we got to talk about customers with disabilities and handling conflict. We got to watch all these old VHS tapes that had terrible color, cheesy acting, and actually pretty quality messages. After my new friend told me about the time he almost got into a fight with his boyfriends deaf ex-boy-friend at a bar and we couldn't stop laughing about it, I almost cried while watching all the sweet videos of paraplegics and the fact that our company wants us to be so sensitive with our passengers that they take the time to show us these videos and make us do activities while being limited in some way. (longest sentence ever.) Every day I learn more about Alaska Airlines and the procedures they take for dealing with customers and the steps used to take care of their employees, the more excited I am that I am entering this field with this specific airline! The care, compassion, and concern that management puts into meeting needs of customers and employees alike is humbling. It's exciting knowing that I am employed by a company I can be proud of and that I believe in. And also that pays me to stay in fancy hotels in Hawaii, Cabo, and Alaska!

Womanhood

I have recently been focusing on the fact that I am a woman. I mean, obviously I am and have been for quite some time, but I don't always feel like it. I like to be free-spirited and childish and young, it's just who I am and that's fine. Truthfully however, I am also a woman and really honestly have been for quite some time. The words we use to describe ourselves can too often end up dictating our identity instead of simply stating it, and I have been referring to myself as a only girl for far too long and ignored my womanly characteristics, denied that I have been growing up. I am now 24 years-old and embarking on this fancy pants new job. I began flight attendant training on Wednesday and feel like I have been training for a year already. Every day I am required to wake up, put on make-up, and dress myself in business attire. I look like a whole new person, but I'm not. As I walked down the hall of my hotel today after my first observation flight (where I got to flash my new ID and cut lines and everyone looked at me knowingly) I looked down at my feet covered by tights and nestled into high heels (with bows on them, of course) and it hit me, I am a grown up with a career. I am woman. Now I still have to officially finish training and pass all my tests and get my new uniform altered to fit my short stature, but I am here. And I love it. Hear me roar.

New Year, New Career

I am about to start over once again. I spent the last year and few months adapting to Portland life and making it my home. Now, just as I start to feel happy and content I throw myself the big kicker, it's time to mix it all up. On January 1st I fly to Seattle, Washington to begin 5 weeks of flight attendant training with Alaska Airlines. A dream job. Another beginning. My whole life, once again, never more literally, up in the air. I don't yet know where I will be living or how often I will be home, I just know that once again things are about to change. I have said many goodbyes already, packed my bag, and am bracing myself for a brand new start. So here is the deal. I have decided that as a means to keep myself busy and give me something to work towards, as well as keep in touch with my dear friends and family, I am going to set up some year long goals for myself. 1. I am going to work on project 365, an activity in which I will be taking a photo a day for a year and posting it with a small caption describing the event. 2. I am going to spend my time in hotels and coffee shops writing. I have always wanted to write a book, so I am going to work on that and/or write small essays and prose. 3. I will be actively trying to post about these things and my adventures more often and therefor keep my blog fully up to date. For those of you about to follow me (and hopefully live alongside me) this next year, thank you. I appreciate feedback but mostly the interactions of friends living life together. So a Prost, to a new year and a new career!

Autumn Returning to Autumn

Autumn is just around the corner, but it's in the air now. Everyone is talking about the upcoming season as though it were a returning friend, and it is. The crisp air, bright leaves, and colorful memories of autumns passed return to envelop me in the reassuring embrace of an intimate friend. It could be at no better time as my first full year back home comes to completion. It is reassurance I am looking for as I continue to make plans for my future and search for contentment in my present. One whole year. Six years have come and gone just as quickly and carelessly as have I. But this is the year I stayed put. This is the year I returned home to be with family and to experience the seasons morph into one another and take over time. Each day dynamic so as to be continually new. Autumn returning to Autumn. Time continues as I stand still allowing the Winter Wind, the Spring Air, the Summer Draft, and the Autumn Breeze to swirl around me, whispering seasonal secrets and impelling me on my way through unexplored, kaleidoscopic time. Harvest and cider and mittens and scarves and pumpkins carved in close friendship and deep love. Lives being lived together and creating memories in the way must be meant to, for why else are we here together? The leaves have grown and now are getting ready to change colors and drop to new places at the roots, a new purpose. Already I hear them rustling as the low sun casts its long shadows on the warm ground.

To make her proud

And I know that she is proud of me, I don't have to guess because she is still here in me.  She comes out every time I dance, when the music floods my ears and the beat takes me over.  She comes out every time it rains and I want to run in it and when my rain gear keeps me dry and I am still fascinated, she is too.  And most importantly she comes put every time I dream, when adventure takes hold of my imagination and doesn't return it until I have found reason to believe the impossible, she is there the whole time.  For all along it was she that taught me to dance, to run, to dream and to believe in my dreams.  It's her I see when I look in the mirror, her blonde curly hair and her big blue eyes full possibilities.  I hope to always be a child.